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  • Writer's pictureAngela Dragon

Learning to ask for what we need

I literally said "Any time you go to Ward's Supermarket, I would love it if you'd buy me a rose" and voilá! I now receive an occasional singular rose, or even a small bouquet like this one. I feel heard and loved.

Small bouquet of flowers

I think one of the biggest issues in relationships is that we expect the other person to either...

💓 Know us well enough to know our wants and needs


💓 Love us enough to know our wants and needs

Neither is true nor reasonable to expect, in my view. When we don't clearly communicate our wants and needs to those who love us, we miss opportunities for deeper connection, mutual understanding, and more attuned expressions of love.

So please, ask for what you want and need! If you want hugs from friends, flowers from your sweetie, time alone, a foot massage, or anything else, use that amazing voice of yours and ASK. Then receive the reply with grace and, ideally, a "thank you" regardless of whether or not the person agrees to meet your needs.

(Of course, if you're in any type of relationship where your needs consistently go unmet after you've clearly expressed them, then it may be time to move on. Either way, it's up to each of us to ask in order to give the other person an opportunity to support us, or to decline if what we're requesting of them is beyond their ability or capacity.)

I wasn't planning to make this a Cuddle Sanctuary promo but this is, quite literally, much of what we practice during the experience. Strengthening our ability to both ask, and to express a clear "no" are vital skills in numerous areas of life.  

The next Cuddle Sanctuary is on Friday, January 19th. Here's more info and the link to registration! 💜

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